Songs About Losing a Son

There is no song that holds all of it. Whatever his age when you lost him, whatever the circumstances, no three minutes of music will ever be big enough for a son.

Still, families ask. Often it is a mother or father sitting with a funeral director, or a sibling scrolling at two in the morning, trying to find something to play at the service. What they are usually looking for is not the perfect song. It is a song that will let the room feel something together, and that will not feel wrong later.

What follows is gathered by mood and moment rather than ranked, because the right song for your son depends entirely on who he was.

Songs that speak from a parent to a child

These are the ones written from inside the loss, or close enough that they land that way. They are direct. Some families find that helpful, and some find it too much for the service itself and save it for later.

• "Tears in Heaven" — Eric Clapton. Written after the death of his four-year-old son. The most quoted song on this list, and still one of the gentlest.
• "Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy)" — John Lennon. Written as a lullaby to a living child, which is exactly why it aches now.
• "Who You'd Be Today" — Kenny Chesney. For the question that never goes away.
• "Lullaby (Goodnight, My Angel)" — Billy Joel. Often chosen by parents of younger children.
• "Gone Too Soon" — Michael Jackson.
• "Supermarket Flowers" — Ed Sheeran. Written about a grandmother, but many families use it for the plain domestic detail of clearing a room.
• "Slipped Away" — Avril Lavigne.

Songs about the boy he was, and the man he became

If your son was grown, the hardest thing is often holding both versions of him at once. These songs make room for that.

• "Forever Young" — Bob Dylan, or the Rod Stewart version.
• "In My Life" — The Beatles.
• "Simple Man" — Lynyrd Skynyrd. A mother's advice to a son. Common at services for men who loved rock.
• "My Wish" — Rascal Flatts. Everything a parent hoped for him.
• "Sweet Child o' Mine" — Guns N' Roses. Not a funeral song by design, which is sometimes the point.
• "Landslide" — Fleetwood Mac.
• "Ripple" — Grateful Dead.
• "The House That Built Me" — Miranda Lambert.

Songs of faith and comfort

For families who want the service to say something about where he is now, or who simply want the room held.

• "Go Rest High on That Mountain" — Vince Gill. Written after the loss of his own brother.
• "I Can Only Imagine" — MercyMe.
• "Amazing Grace" — traditional, and lovely on solo bagpipes or a single voice.
• "Held" — Natalie Grant. Written specifically about the loss of a child.
• "Blessings" — Laura Story.
• "Angels Among Us" — Alabama.
• "It Is Well With My Soul" — traditional hymn, written by a father after losing his children.

Songs for the quieter moments

For a slideshow, a processional, the walk out, or the long drive home afterward. These carry emotion without demanding that anyone hold it together.

• "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" — Israel Kamakawiwo'ole.
• "Fix You" — Coldplay.
• "See You Again" — Wiz Khalifa featuring Charlie Puth.
• "I'll Be Seeing You" — Billie Holiday.
• "Vincent" — Don McLean.
• "Time to Say Goodbye" — Andrea Bocelli and Sarah Brightman.
• "Photograph" — Ed Sheeran.
• "Hallelujah" — Jeff Buckley or Leonard Cohen.

A note on choosing

Two things worth knowing, from families who have done this.

First, listen all the way through before you commit. Songs turn at the second verse. A lyric that is fine on the radio can be unbearable in a room full of people who loved him, and you deserve to find that out in your car rather than in a pew.

Second, his own music counts. If he played the same album on every road trip, if he had a song he sang badly and loudly, if there was something his grandmother played when he was small — that song will mean more than anything on this list. It does not have to be a sad song. Plenty of services end with something loud and joyful because that was simply who he was.

When no existing song quite fits

Sometimes families go through every list and none of it lands. The songs are about grief in general, and your son was specific. He had a laugh, a phrase he overused, a job he was proud of, a dog, a way of showing up when someone needed him.

That is the gap Their Life Song was built for. Families share the stories and details that made him who he was, and we create an original tribute song from them — something to play at the service, and to keep long after. It is not a replacement for the songs he already loved. For some families it simply sits alongside them.

Whatever you choose, choose it gently. There is no version of this you can get wrong.

Related reading

• Custom Memorial Songs: The Complete Guide
• Tribute Songs for a Funeral: Songs Families Choose, and How to Make One of Your Own
• Gentle, Meaningful Memorial Ideas for a Child Who Died